What crazy, whacked-out alternate universe have I stumbled into this time?

Can anybody else lick their backs? Does Mr. Spock have a beard? Are donuts going to start falling from the sky?

Did the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel editorialize in favor of abstinence education and restoring the QEO on the same day?

One: Abstain and prevent teen pregnancy.

If K-12 students master the academics, their launch into the working adult world can take them to career heights. Nothing will thwart that trajectory more conclusively than a pregnancy.

Young people must acquire skills early to resist the pressures to become sexually active. But because sexual activity often will occur, equally important is the knowledge to still avoid pregnancy and the health- and life-threatening diseases that can accompany unprotected sex.

Odd that the only mention of "abstinence" is in the title, but still.

Two: Restore the QEO

To repeal the QEO in uncertain economic times is unwise. To do it without retaining fairness in arbitration rules is irresponsible.

...A QEO would impose necessary soberness. With it gone, arbitrators should be able to give heavy weight to the economic realities imposed by revenue limits and local conditions.

Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads.